John's perspective on the adoption so far!

You can view his video post HERE!

Home Study. Check!

We finished our home study process this morning. Our caseworker was at the house for a little over 3 hours. It went really well! We got back our personality test scores and they were so interesting to look at. We had to take them on ourselves & each other. It turns out we know each other pretty well almost scoring perfect on that section. It was fascinating seeing how we rate individually as well. Overall a great way to look into our relationship:)

The next step will be entering the match book. We plan on entering it January 15th if everything goes through ok. We are confident it will. After we are in the match book we will wait for the phone call from our agency with either a birth mom who wants to meet with us to discuss the possibility of setting up an adoption plan or a we could receive a hospital call. Our caseworker also reminded us to let our friends & families aware of our plan to adopt in case they know of a birth mom seeking an adoptive family. God works in mysterious ways!

Please keep us in your prayers as we continue to seek His will & prepare our hearts and home for a little one:) We are so blessed to have all of your support.

-Britt

His will be done.

I'm not sure who all reads this or if I am updating our blog anymore for you than for me (Britt). Since my tummy isn't growing & I'm not fighting off strange cravings I write. I write to remind myself that our child is on their way home. God is preparing our hearts & our home for the addition of one of His children. I couldn't feel more blessed & grateful.

We will have our last home study visit next week on the 15th. They've been going very well. We had a little set back recently, we will be entered in the match book in January not this month due to the amount of time we've been married. They encouraged us to wait until after our 2 year anniversary in hopes of there being no "red flags" when they present us to the agency's board. We have also been in contact with a organization where we are hoping to receive some financial assistance with the large placement fee we will most likely be paying sometime in 2011 when we bring our sweet baby boy or girl home. Of course this requires a lot more paperwork but we are getting pretty good at it by now! God is opening doors, for this we are thankful. As I work on the nursery (yes, I am already nesting:) It's helping us mentally grasp the fact we'll be adopting hopefully sooner than later) I have been thinking about & praying for our birth mother & child. I love them already. This probably sounds strange but it's true. I love our birth mom for the selfless decision she will make & the trust she is going to have in us to hand us the precious child she's been carrying in her belly for 9 months. I don't know the kind of hurt she will face but I pray for God's grace on her. I love our child because of the joy, laughter & memories we will create together. I love our child already because his or her story was carefully constructed by our Creature & we were chosen to be their parents. What a blessing!

I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas! John & I will be having a quiet Christmas at our home just the two of us...and our mutts of course. We are excited about the idea that this may be our last Christmas without any kiddos. Although we love this time in our relationship we are ecstatic to become parents & hope to fill our home with tiny feet and toys soon:)

Thank you for your continued prayer. As always, we seek & ask that His will be done in our lives.

-Brittany

Why are we adopting?

I was asked on Facebook yesterday why John & I have chosen to adopt for our first child. I realized I have never really put anything up on my FB or blog about WHY we have chosen to adopt our first. So here is a short & sweet explanation why...

When I was 17 I (Brittany) was diagnosed with PCOS. The diagnosis didn't affect me much but one of the symptoms the doctor brought to my attention was that women with PCOS can have issues with getting pregnant but for most it's not a problem. So I left her office with a prescription to birth control & was on my way. I was still young & having kids wasn't on my radar quite yet so I didn't think much about what she had said. A couple years later I found myself in a couple relationships. I felt like it was important to tell them about my PCOS & that there was a possibility I might have a harder time getting pregnant or not be able to at all. I guess I felt like telling them because I thought they deserved to know just in case things progressed. In having those conversations with others I began to think about the possibility of not being able to have "biological" children. Knowing I desired to be a mother someday I began thinking about adoption...a lot. As my faith grew & matured so did my heart for adoption. For me it was never a concern not being able to have a child that looked like me, talked like me or God forbid inherit my crooked teeth and acne! I just knew I wanted to be a mom & I desired to adopt. Of course, I also thought about the idea of having biological children (and still do) but KNEW adoption was a must. This was one of the first serious conversations John & I ever had while dating. I learned he had the same heart for adoption & that made me even more interested in him. Well you know the rest of that story;)

After about a year of marriage we decided to start thinking about growing our family. We thought about both having a baby & adopting for our first. We prayed for guidance & boy did we get it! God had a tight grip on our hearts & gave us some sure signs of what he wanted for us right now...adoption. After about 4 months of researching agencies both domestically & internationally we decided to have a domestic adoption for our first. The main reason for this were finances. It costs significantly more to adopt internationally & with us being newlyweds & owners of brand new businesses cost was key. I can't help but chuckle to myself anytime people say they'd adopt if it wasn't so expensive. I know they mean well but the reality is if God calls you to something He will make it happen. We have been saving our pennies to pay for it & still have a ways to go but we trust it will all work out as long as we're doing what we can. We're not rich, far from it but we feel called to care for the orphans & give a child that's already here a loving family. There have been some hurdles in our process so far & I would be naive to say there won't be anymore but we trust that God has a plan for our family. A perfect plan.

I will not leave you as orphans, I will come to you. John 14:18

At the end of one road & the beginning of bringing home baby Hagensen!

John & I had our last adoption class this week. We were excited to have them come to an end & looking forward to not having to drive an hour to Phoenix every Tuesday but it's bittersweet. We met some amazing couples during our classes & learned a ton. I think we were going into it not expecting to learn & grow as much as we did. The information that was shared during the classes not only answered a lot of our questions but made us aware of things we had not yet considered. It also solidified our decision to adopt domestically for our first child & through CFCA.

Now what!? Some of you reading this we may talk to frequently so you know where we're at with everything now. Most of you I am assuming we do not get to chat with often so this update is for you:) We had our first meeting with our wonderful caseworker, Summer this past Monday. It went great, we discussed our family's genealogy & some of our experiences growing up. We are fortunate to have a caseworker we feel comfortable sharing such detailed, personal information with. She truly is a blessing! We planned out the rest of our home studies & figured out a tentative timeline for our adoption. This is what we know (things can always change) We are hoping to be done with our home study & in the "Match Book" by the 20th of December!!! Anytime after that we will be ready to get a match or a...hospital call! We are trying to remain patient & take it day by day but I can't help but think we could have a baby boy or girl in as early as 2 months (of course it will probably take longer but is possible). We are starting to search Craigslist for deals on baby stuff & research what we want. Since we will not be having a shower until after the papers are signed (5-10 days after the birth) we will be buying most of the necessities before. The nursery is no longer an empty room it is filling up with baby equipment:) I can't help but smile when I pass it every morning on my way to my office. It will be filled with a cute little creature in God's time. For now, we are staying focused with working extra hard to make money to pay for the adoption expenses & enjoying this special time before kiddos. I think this is a good spot to share the fact that I adore my husband. I really love him so much & feel honored to be living life along side him. We are blessed to have each other. I can't wait to see him hold our baby & be a daddy. I know he is going to be a wonderful, involved father. That is one of the reasons I married him, I love that about him. He is also the person that brings me back to reality when I get carried away with dreaming. We balance one another. We have purchased a couple baby books to educate ourselves on being parents since we are for a lack of better term, "clueless" but eager to learn! If you have any recs please let us know. We are also picking out names. Just when we think we've decided on one it changes, we are planning on allowing our birth mom to help us too if she wants. We will keep you posted on the progress!

Please join us in praying for the following:) God not only listens but hears...

-Our birth mom's health & comfort in the decision she is making.

-Our baby's health

-Our financial situation as we continue to save & fund this adoption on our own.

-All the kiddos in the world who are still waiting for families to take them home & call them their own.

-John & my hearts as we prepare for parenthood.

I am leaving you with this video I saw on another adoption blog. Although we are currently adopting domestically we are planning on adopting from Ethiopia next. This is a video taken of one of the orphanges in Ethiopia. I couldn't help but cry as I watched it. Such beautiful children who are more than deserving of a forever home & family. I know adopting a child isn't for everyone but everyone can help in someway. It is my hope you do!

Une journée au Toukoul
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Happy Thursday!

Back to school...

We had our first of 7 adoption class last night in Phoenix. Of course, we were late because of crazy traffic which if you know me you know I was mortified walking in!! Not only are we the youngest by far we are now the irresponsible couple! Naww they were really nice about it & it wasn't a big deal at all:)

Basically the class was a meet & greet and with some of the staff at CFCA and about 6 other couples planning to adopt through CFCA and also an overview of what to expect during our adoption. It was really refreshing to meet other couples choosing to adopt in our area since we don't know a ton right now. John already invited one of them over for dinner, guess I will have to pretend I know how to cook!

We have our physicals & fingerprinting next week. After we complete those we will begin our home studies!! So exciting! We will have 4 visits during that process with our caseworker and after our classes our complete we will go into the matchbook:) It finally feels like things are coming together.

We will keep you posted on the homestudy process!

Love you all, please pray for our birth mom & baby.

Britt

Overwhelmed

The last few days as I've been going about my everyday routine I have been extremely overwhelmed with God's grace & beauty. What this has looked like for me is holding myself back from hugging complete strangers because they simply look like they need a friend, wiping back tears that are about to fall from my eyes when I see a child smiling at me, and even wanting to talk to the person sitting next to me at the coffee shop but not starting a conversation because I don't want them to think I'm weird...WHY? Why, do I hold myself back from loving like Jesus, from showing compassion and love to others out of fear of getting rejected or looking odd? Why do I care so much about what others think of me and my actions? I don't have the answers but I know God is doing something incredible in my heart and for this I am grateful and a bit hesitant as to what He's preparing me for. All I know is that our God is faithful and GREAT.

John and I are getting excited to start our adoption classes in October. We have been taking a breather from our paperwork but will be getting it finished within the next couple weeks. I am at peace with where we're at in the "process" right now but can't help but dream of what's to come in our future. My heart is aching to see our child, how blessed we will be when we meet them.

Letter to our Family & Friends

Hope you all are enjoying your summer!

As many of you know we have begun the journey of growing our family through adoption. Unfortunately, we haven’t had the time to sit down individually and update all of you on the process, but your support is priceless to us and something that we value greatly.

Many of you have inquired as to why we are adopting, and many have even been surprised at our decision to adopt before having any biological children. Our desire to adopt has been something that the Lord placed on each of our hearts individually prior to meeting one another, and that common passion was a driving force in the early stages of our relationship. In honesty we were even surprised by the call that we felt to adopt for our first child, but are excited and eager to step through that open door!

For our first adoption, we are working with a Christian-based domestic agency located in Phoenix. Our initial home study and overall experience so far with this agency and specifically our caseworker has given us a peace that the Lord has us in the right place.

We understand that adoption is a personal calling, but our desire is to raise awareness to the enormous need; not only around the world, but also in our own back yard. We hope that through the documentation of our process you will not only better understand our personal calling, but also feel encouraged as followers of Christ to help those in need. We believe that adoption is a great representation of Christ’s adoption of us, and are excited to see God’s plan revealed to us throughout this journey.

As many of your know, obstacles abound throughout the adoption process. It is long and arduous and includes many unknowns. Part of the reason that we are writing this is to give you specific areas that you can be praying for us. First off, the timetable for bringing our child home can be anywhere from 4 months from now to 2 or 3 years. As you can imagine, that is a difficult waiting period and one that requires a great deal of faith. Another obstacle is that the birth parent(s) have 72 hours in the state of Arizona to change their mind (the baby would already be in our home). As you can imagine, that will be a tough 3-day period where trust and hope will be essential. Another obvious part of the equation is the financial challenges associated with adoption. We have taken a leap of faith that the Lord will provide the resources as we work hard and are good stewards of the gifts the Lord has given to us. We have already begun saving for the adoption but still have a long way to go as we anticipate it costing between 14-20 thousand dollars. Please pray that the Lord will provide the amount needed so we can complete the process.

We love you all so much & can’t wait to introduce you to our little one:) Feel free to follow our journey at our blog: http://ourlittlestoryjandb.blogspot.com/

Thank you for taking the time to read this, we look forward to growing our family with such a great group of loved ones! -

John & Britt

Patience & Faith

Dear little one,

Daddy & I have been busy this past month! We have been in North Dakota & Washington working & visiting family and man did they have a lot of questions for us about YOU! We absolutely relished in every opportunity we had to tell them about the adoption process & why we can't wait to meet you:) You need to know something baby, your family is so excited to meet you! They are all so wonderful and cannot wait to hold you & love on you! You will have cousins to play with & grandparents who will spoil you to bits! I'm sitting in Suncadia, WA as I write this surrounded by your future family. We have been hiking, biking, playing tennis & tons of family games. There have been plenty of yummy meals & long conversations, your family is full of unique personalities and there is no shortage of love for one another! We are enjoying our time with family but something is missing...it's you. I am trying to stay patient, I have complete faith you will come to us at the perfect time.

Love you so much already!

Mommy

A letter to our baby

I wrote our baby a letter yesterday. I kept thinking about him/her & thought it'd be fun to put some of my feelings on paper (well not really, I typed it but paper sounds better:)) Here it is!

Dear Baby,

Mommy & Daddy have been thinking about you a lot lately. We’ve been wondering where you are, what you’ll look like, and when we’ll get to meet you. We’re hoping it’s not too far away! You are going to have two mommies little one! Lucky you, not every baby gets two moms...just very special ones. Your birth mommy has a very difficult decision to make, one that she will think about for the rest of her life. She will be making the decision to give you to us, your mommy & daddy for life. Your birth mom loves you & that is why she will make this hard decision. She wanted you to have a life she couldn’t offer you, I will tell you more about this when you’re a little older. For now daddy & I will have to be patient & wait for God to bring you home to us. We are very excited to meet you sweetie. Mommy can’t seem to think about anything else lately. You will have siblings too baby, hopefully a few of them! God has called us to adopt you, YOU are our PLAN A. Please never forget that! You might have some questions for us when you get older & we want you to ask us whatever you want to. We love you & prayed for you long before you came into our lives...that’s what a lot mommy’s & daddy’s do, they dream about their babies long before they come into the world! It might sound a little silly to you but we loved you long before we met you, we just knew you would be perfectly ours.

I want to promise you something baby. Mommy & Daddy will always love you, support you and pray for you. We promise to teach you about the Lord & love one another forever. We have a dream for you too, we hope you will love the Lord & follow His call in your life. Mommy & Daddy are following God’s call & that’s why we’re adopting you. What a blessing you will be in our lives! I have always wanted to be a mommy, you’ve been on my mind for many years & I am anticipating bringing you home. We'll do lots of fun things together, daddy wants to teach you about sports & mommy will teach you about music & art.

With much love & anticipation,

Mommy

Love this book!

A friend of ours got me this book last week. She raved about the author & thought I would like it, she was right! I started it yesterday at the pool & am almost done:) It's one of those books you don't want to finish because it's SO good. Not a chapter went by with out a few tears falling on the pages...I am usually not a crier when I read but this book truly moved me. It was so real & applicable to what John and I are going through right now.

The book is a compilation of adoption stories, all different types. I could relate to the couple's anticipation & desire to grow their families through adoption, some by choice most due to infertility. Regardless, all the stories were about the miracle of adoption & how God's plan for our life isn't always our own. His way is the only way we can experience true joy & this book was a reminder of that truth.

I would recommend this book to anyone! Everyone has been adopted by our Father & everyone will have a friend or family member who has or will have experience with adoption so it's very applicable & just a great quick read.

On a side note, I CAN'T GET OUR BABY OFF MY MIND! :) Just had to share that with you!

Q & A

Today we met with our caseworker for the first time. She said it is usually an hour meeting & we just talk about the basics of the adoption process & she asks us some questions about ourselves and so on...welp, the meeting was 3 hours long! I'm sure most of you are not surprised at all, John & I can be a little chatty. Our caseworker is GREAT, I've read some horror stories online about caseworkers & the home study process but from what I can tell it will be a fun experience & a very comfortable relationship. We felt comfortable with her right away, we feel fortunate to have been matched up with such a kind, compassionate caseworker! It will definitely make the process that much smoother:)

We will be sharing the news that we have started the adoption process with the rest of the world today. We wanted to wait until we met with our caseworker & selected our agency. Now that we have we are absolutely over joyed to let the world know of our plans!

The next step is filling out a lot of paperwork & deciding when we will be starting our classes (we'll take 7 weeks worth), since we will be in ND most of July we might not be able to start until October which is a little ways away but we are confident things will work out perfectly. I think it will be challenging remaining patient but we trust everything will happen according to God's plan & in His time.

Some more exciting news is that Jania & Justin (John's sister) will be having their second baby girl TODAY!!!! We are anxiously awaiting the call! Aunty & Uncle are excited to meet little Olivia:)

Meeting with our caseworker:)

I got our first call from our caseworker Monday, her name is Summer. She sounds super friendly & I've heard really great things about her from another couple who she was assigned to through CFCA.

We will be having our initial meeting at our home this coming Monday. Our caseworker will be going over the process in greater detail with us & get to know us better to see if we will be a "good fit" for the agency. She lives out in our area so we will probably be having most of our meeting here & not the agency in Phoenix. That will be nice! I am really looking forward to this meeting because I feel like it's one step closer to starting the process to bring home our first child:) Just the thought stirs up all kinds of emotions in me! There are so many unknowns like, what color of eyes will he or she have? What race will our sweet baby be? What will our birth mom be like? How long will everything take? They go on & on!! Thankfully, we have complete trust in our Lord to unite us with the baby we're supposed to have & we have faith that He has the perfect plan for this chapter in our lives. Knowing that calms my concerns & pleases my heart.

I will keep ya posted! Please pray for us, as you know there are so many things to consider when taking that first step to growing our family. We love you all & are thankful to have your support!

I couldn't resist!

It's been a fun, interesting, & exciting week for us! We have told pretty much all our family & close friends about our decision to adopt. For the most part everyone has been supportive of the idea (of course we got the occasional "I didn't know you two had been trying" assuming we are adopting because we have been unable to get pregnant. When we tell them "nope, this is what we are feeling called to for our first" we are sometimes given a look of bewilderment...oh well! We know what we want & where we feel the Lord taking us & our family:)

It is a unique journey starting to prepare for a baby that isn't growing inside of me. There is no noxiousness, no cravings, nothing in my body telling me we will be having a baby. Even though I am not experiencing the common sighs of pregnancy there is the tickle inside my stomach every time I think of our little one, there is a strong longing to hold our baby, & most of all there is a sense of peace & contentment every time I think about the idea of starting our family through adoption. I am trying to be patient while we wait to hear back from the agency about whether we will be accepted into the program or not, I am feeling hopeful.

During the last few months I have found myself drawn to the baby section every time I visit a store...I never intend to buy anything I just walk through the aisles & picture what our nursery will look like, what clothes our baby will wear, & what toys he/she will drool all over. A couple days ago while at one of my favorite stores (TJ Maxx) I found some shoes I just couldn't NOT buy, I had to get them. Even though the logical Brittany was telling me not to & that it was silly, I got them. My first baby purchase ever and it felt darn good:) The pics of the shoes were taken in our baby's nursery...as you can see we have not started it yet & probably won't until awhile down the adoption road.

They are blue & made for a little boy I'm guessing but who says a baby girl can't rock it out in blue...that's the feminist in me I guess!

Waiting with anticipation & hope,

Britt

and the paperwork begins!

In case you were wondering what the first step is in the adoption process is it's PAPERWORK and lots of it!

So today I sit here enjoying my cold cup of Joe filling out the first bunch of applications. For one of the domestic agencies we had to fill out a couple statements of faith. I posted my response below, it was challenging but fun to put my thoughts into writing. Welp, enough procrastinating!

Have a great Wednesday!

Response to question #1: Please describe Jesus Christ’s involvement in your life. Do you feel that Jesus has a central role in your life? If so, when did that begin to take place for you?

Since I accepted Jesus into my life 7 years ago I have been dramatically changed. The contentment & peace my relationship with the Lord brings me is beyond words and the central part of my being. The grace & mercy God has shown me is humbling and it is my hope to be a witness of the Lord’s truth to everyone in my life, especially our children. My basis of how to live life & treat others comes from the Bible. Scripture gives us clear & direct guidelines on our role here on earth during this lifetime. Though I fail at living the life He designed for us to live all the time I am completely amazed by His grace and ability to shape our sinful hearts & mold us into His servants. I pray that my heart will always be His to guide, my feet will always follow His call, and that my mind will never stop seeking Him and His will for our family.

Response to question #2: What do you want your children to understand about the message of Christianity?

I have been praying for our children since I became a believer myself. It is my hope that they not only know who the Lord is but make a personal choice to follow & seek Him. John and I plan to witness to our children through our personal relationships with the Lord, our relationship with one another, spending time reading scripture with our children, & teaching them the power of prayer in their daily life. Communication is not only key in a marriage but in any relationship, including that of our Savior. It is important that our children not just know the surface of what it means to be a believer of Jesus Christ but that they understand the importance of having a personal relationship with Him.

Our call to adopt...

John & I have always had the desire & calling to adopt. This was something we talked about when we first met & have been praying about since we started our life together. Over the past few months I have felt God's pull on my heart. Every time I go to worship, pray, or even brush my teeth :) I feel Him calling for us to adopt...soon. I have tried to shake it, knowing this wasn't "the best time" & when I do I hear His call even more.

After many conversations, and several hours of research we are confident in the step we're taking towards adopting our first child. Just the thought of it brings so much joy to my heart! We wanted to share this with all of you who love & support us and hope you will come along for the journey. As always, your prayers would mean the world to us.

Where we're at right now in "the adoption process" is deciding whether to adopt domestically or internationally. This has been a harder decision than we thought, there is so much need for both. What we DO know is we are planning on adopting an African American infant, probably a male (they are usually the last to get adopted). We have talked with & researched many domestic agencies & are pretty confident in the one we will go with if we choose that route. I am meeting with a few mothers who have adopted both domestically & internationally and looking forward to getting their insight & advice. If any of you know anyone who has experience with adoption please let us know as we would love to talk with them. There is SO much to learn & consider.

You all know that adoption can be expensive, the average cost ranging from $18,000-$30,000 when all is said & done. The cost is pretty comparable for both I & D adoptions. The time it takes to bring your child home is the biggest difference in comparing the two. Being newlyweds & new business owners money is definitely NOT in abundance. We are trying to be wise with how we allocate our income & adoption is something we're saving towards. The cost is more than worth bringing our baby home! We are also looking into financing options.

This news might be surprising to some of you & to many it will come as no surprise at all. We have been shown the Lord's mercy, grace, & love and we look forward to the opportunity to giving a child the chance to live a life & know the Father he/she might otherwise never know. Two of the countries we are looking into for international adoption are Uganda, & the Congo. We are familiar with ministries in both countries. We are hoping to visit the country we choose to adopt from (if we go that route) within the year.

Right now we are allowing our Father to prepare us for this HUGE journey. Our hearts long for our child we have never met. We know the this will take great patience & that many struggles are ahead of us but this is nothing in comparison to bringing our child home. Sorry for sharing this information via blogging for some of you, it is the best and most effective way to share the news with many people. The reason we have chosen to blog about it is because we feel it is a unique way for us to document our journey and share it with all of you. It is also our hope that it will give insight & guidance to couples planning to adopt in the future.

We love you all & are reminded daily of how blessed we are to have such loving and supportive family & friends.

We will keep you posted on here about our journey! Knowing me there will be postings about other Hagensen shinanigans also:)

B & J