Friday, November 19, 2010

Why are we adopting?

I was asked on Facebook yesterday why John & I have chosen to adopt for our first child. I realized I have never really put anything up on my FB or blog about WHY we have chosen to adopt our first. So here is a short & sweet explanation why...

When I was 17 I (Brittany) was diagnosed with PCOS. The diagnosis didn't affect me much but one of the symptoms the doctor brought to my attention was that women with PCOS can have issues with getting pregnant but for most it's not a problem. So I left her office with a prescription to birth control & was on my way. I was still young & having kids wasn't on my radar quite yet so I didn't think much about what she had said. A couple years later I found myself in a couple relationships. I felt like it was important to tell them about my PCOS & that there was a possibility I might have a harder time getting pregnant or not be able to at all. I guess I felt like telling them because I thought they deserved to know just in case things progressed. In having those conversations with others I began to think about the possibility of not being able to have "biological" children. Knowing I desired to be a mother someday I began thinking about adoption...a lot. As my faith grew & matured so did my heart for adoption. For me it was never a concern not being able to have a child that looked like me, talked like me or God forbid inherit my crooked teeth and acne! I just knew I wanted to be a mom & I desired to adopt. Of course, I also thought about the idea of having biological children (and still do) but KNEW adoption was a must. This was one of the first serious conversations John & I ever had while dating. I learned he had the same heart for adoption & that made me even more interested in him. Well you know the rest of that story;)

After about a year of marriage we decided to start thinking about growing our family. We thought about both having a baby & adopting for our first. We prayed for guidance & boy did we get it! God had a tight grip on our hearts & gave us some sure signs of what he wanted for us right now...adoption. After about 4 months of researching agencies both domestically & internationally we decided to have a domestic adoption for our first. The main reason for this were finances. It costs significantly more to adopt internationally & with us being newlyweds & owners of brand new businesses cost was key. I can't help but chuckle to myself anytime people say they'd adopt if it wasn't so expensive. I know they mean well but the reality is if God calls you to something He will make it happen. We have been saving our pennies to pay for it & still have a ways to go but we trust it will all work out as long as we're doing what we can. We're not rich, far from it but we feel called to care for the orphans & give a child that's already here a loving family. There have been some hurdles in our process so far & I would be naive to say there won't be anymore but we trust that God has a plan for our family. A perfect plan.

I will not leave you as orphans, I will come to you. John 14:18

Thursday, November 18, 2010

At the end of one road & the beginning of bringing home baby Hagensen!

John & I had our last adoption class this week. We were excited to have them come to an end & looking forward to not having to drive an hour to Phoenix every Tuesday but it's bittersweet. We met some amazing couples during our classes & learned a ton. I think we were going into it not expecting to learn & grow as much as we did. The information that was shared during the classes not only answered a lot of our questions but made us aware of things we had not yet considered. It also solidified our decision to adopt domestically for our first child & through CFCA.

Now what!? Some of you reading this we may talk to frequently so you know where we're at with everything now. Most of you I am assuming we do not get to chat with often so this update is for you:) We had our first meeting with our wonderful caseworker, Summer this past Monday. It went great, we discussed our family's genealogy & some of our experiences growing up. We are fortunate to have a caseworker we feel comfortable sharing such detailed, personal information with. She truly is a blessing! We planned out the rest of our home studies & figured out a tentative timeline for our adoption. This is what we know (things can always change) We are hoping to be done with our home study & in the "Match Book" by the 20th of December!!! Anytime after that we will be ready to get a match or a...hospital call! We are trying to remain patient & take it day by day but I can't help but think we could have a baby boy or girl in as early as 2 months (of course it will probably take longer but is possible). We are starting to search Craigslist for deals on baby stuff & research what we want. Since we will not be having a shower until after the papers are signed (5-10 days after the birth) we will be buying most of the necessities before. The nursery is no longer an empty room it is filling up with baby equipment:) I can't help but smile when I pass it every morning on my way to my office. It will be filled with a cute little creature in God's time. For now, we are staying focused with working extra hard to make money to pay for the adoption expenses & enjoying this special time before kiddos. I think this is a good spot to share the fact that I adore my husband. I really love him so much & feel honored to be living life along side him. We are blessed to have each other. I can't wait to see him hold our baby & be a daddy. I know he is going to be a wonderful, involved father. That is one of the reasons I married him, I love that about him. He is also the person that brings me back to reality when I get carried away with dreaming. We balance one another. We have purchased a couple baby books to educate ourselves on being parents since we are for a lack of better term, "clueless" but eager to learn! If you have any recs please let us know. We are also picking out names. Just when we think we've decided on one it changes, we are planning on allowing our birth mom to help us too if she wants. We will keep you posted on the progress!

Please join us in praying for the following:) God not only listens but hears...
-Our birth mom's health & comfort in the decision she is making.
-Our baby's health
-Our financial situation as we continue to save & fund this adoption on our own.
-All the kiddos in the world who are still waiting for families to take them home & call them their own.
-John & my hearts as we prepare for parenthood.

I am leaving you with this video I saw on another adoption blog. Although we are currently adopting domestically we are planning on adopting from Ethiopia next. This is a video taken of one of the orphanges in Ethiopia. I couldn't help but cry as I watched it. Such beautiful children who are more than deserving of a forever home & family. I know adopting a child isn't for everyone but everyone can help in someway. It is my hope you do!


Happy Thursday!

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Back to school...

We had our first of 7 adoption class last night in Phoenix. Of course, we were late because of crazy traffic which if you know me you know I was mortified walking in!! Not only are we the youngest by far we are now the irresponsible couple! Naww they were really nice about it & it wasn't a big deal at all:)
Basically the class was a meet & greet and with some of the staff at CFCA and about 6 other couples planning to adopt through CFCA and also an overview of what to expect during our adoption. It was really refreshing to meet other couples choosing to adopt in our area since we don't know a ton right now. John already invited one of them over for dinner, guess I will have to pretend I know how to cook!
We have our physicals & fingerprinting next week. After we complete those we will begin our home studies!! So exciting! We will have 4 visits during that process with our caseworker and after our classes our complete we will go into the matchbook:) It finally feels like things are coming together.

We will keep you posted on the homestudy process!

Love you all, please pray for our birth mom & baby.

Britt

Saturday, August 28, 2010

Overwhelmed

The last few days as I've been going about my everyday routine I have been extremely overwhelmed with God's grace & beauty. What this has looked like for me is holding myself back from hugging complete strangers because they simply look like they need a friend, wiping back tears that are about to fall from my eyes when I see a child smiling at me, and even wanting to talk to the person sitting next to me at the coffee shop but not starting a conversation because I don't want them to think I'm weird...WHY? Why, do I hold myself back from loving like Jesus, from showing compassion and love to others out of fear of getting rejected or looking odd? Why do I care so much about what others think of me and my actions? I don't have the answers but I know God is doing something incredible in my heart and for this I am grateful and a bit hesitant as to what He's preparing me for. All I know is that our God is faithful and GREAT.

John and I are getting excited to start our adoption classes in October. We have been taking a breather from our paperwork but will be getting it finished within the next couple weeks. I am at peace with where we're at in the "process" right now but can't help but dream of what's to come in our future. My heart is aching to see our child, how blessed we will be when we meet them.

Friday, July 30, 2010

Letter to our Family & Friends

Hope you all are enjoying your summer!


As many of you know we have begun the journey of growing our family through adoption. Unfortunately, we haven’t had the time to sit down individually and update all of you on the process, but your support is priceless to us and something that we value greatly.


Many of you have inquired as to why we are adopting, and many have even been surprised at our decision to adopt before having any biological children. Our desire to adopt has been something that the Lord placed on each of our hearts individually prior to meeting one another, and that common passion was a driving force in the early stages of our relationship. In honesty we were even surprised by the call that we felt to adopt for our first child, but are excited and eager to step through that open door!


For our first adoption, we are working with a Christian-based domestic agency located in Phoenix. Our initial home study and overall experience so far with this agency and specifically our caseworker has given us a peace that the Lord has us in the right place.


We understand that adoption is a personal calling, but our desire is to raise awareness to the enormous need; not only around the world, but also in our own back yard. We hope that through the documentation of our process you will not only better understand our personal calling, but also feel encouraged as followers of Christ to help those in need. We believe that adoption is a great representation of Christ’s adoption of us, and are excited to see God’s plan revealed to us throughout this journey.


As many of your know, obstacles abound throughout the adoption process. It is long and arduous and includes many unknowns. Part of the reason that we are writing this is to give you specific areas that you can be praying for us. First off, the timetable for bringing our child home can be anywhere from 4 months from now to 2 or 3 years. As you can imagine, that is a difficult waiting period and one that requires a great deal of faith. Another obstacle is that the birth parent(s) have 72 hours in the state of Arizona to change their mind (the baby would already be in our home). As you can imagine, that will be a tough 3-day period where trust and hope will be essential. Another obvious part of the equation is the financial challenges associated with adoption. We have taken a leap of faith that the Lord will provide the resources as we work hard and are good stewards of the gifts the Lord has given to us. We have already begun saving for the adoption but still have a long way to go as we anticipate it costing between 14-20 thousand dollars. Please pray that the Lord will provide the amount needed so we can complete the process.


We love you all so much & can’t wait to introduce you to our little one:) Feel free to follow our journey at our blog: http://ourlittlestoryjandb.blogspot.com/


Thank you for taking the time to read this, we look forward to growing our family with such a great group of loved ones! -


John & Britt

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Patience & Faith

Dear little one,

Daddy & I have been busy this past month! We have been in North Dakota & Washington working & visiting family and man did they have a lot of questions for us about YOU! We absolutely relished in every opportunity we had to tell them about the adoption process & why we can't wait to meet you:) You need to know something baby, your family is so excited to meet you! They are all so wonderful and cannot wait to hold you & love on you! You will have cousins to play with & grandparents who will spoil you to bits! I'm sitting in Suncadia, WA as I write this surrounded by your future family. We have been hiking, biking, playing tennis & tons of family games. There have been plenty of yummy meals & long conversations, your family is full of unique personalities and there is no shortage of love for one another! We are enjoying our time with family but something is missing...it's you. I am trying to stay patient, I have complete faith you will come to us at the perfect time.

Love you so much already!

Mommy

Sunday, June 20, 2010

A letter to our baby

I wrote our baby a letter yesterday. I kept thinking about him/her & thought it'd be fun to put some of my feelings on paper (well not really, I typed it but paper sounds better:)) Here it is!

Dear Baby,


Mommy & Daddy have been thinking about you a lot lately. We’ve been wondering where you are, what you’ll look like, and when we’ll get to meet you. We’re hoping it’s not too far away! You are going to have two mommies little one! Lucky you, not every baby gets two moms...just very special ones. Your birth mommy has a very difficult decision to make, one that she will think about for the rest of her life. She will be making the decision to give you to us, your mommy & daddy for life. Your birth mom loves you & that is why she will make this hard decision. She wanted you to have a life she couldn’t offer you, I will tell you more about this when you’re a little older. For now daddy & I will have to be patient & wait for God to bring you home to us. We are very excited to meet you sweetie. Mommy can’t seem to think about anything else lately. You will have siblings too baby, hopefully a few of them! God has called us to adopt you, YOU are our PLAN A. Please never forget that! You might have some questions for us when you get older & we want you to ask us whatever you want to. We love you & prayed for you long before you came into our lives...that’s what a lot mommy’s & daddy’s do, they dream about their babies long before they come into the world! It might sound a little silly to you but we loved you long before we met you, we just knew you would be perfectly ours.


I want to promise you something baby. Mommy & Daddy will always love you, support you and pray for you. We promise to teach you about the Lord & love one another forever. We have a dream for you too, we hope you will love the Lord & follow His call in your life. Mommy & Daddy are following God’s call & that’s why we’re adopting you. What a blessing you will be in our lives! I have always wanted to be a mommy, you’ve been on my mind for many years & I am anticipating bringing you home. We'll do lots of fun things together, daddy wants to teach you about sports & mommy will teach you about music & art.


With much love & anticipation,


Mommy